LESSON NUMBER ONE:
Yeah, if you're sleeping and someone happens to kiss you and wake you up... well that true love, alright!
There's actually this art museum where some young women lay on a bed and fall asleep. Then, the tourists try to kiss them and if one of them wakes up when the tourist kisses them, then they have to marry. I'm serious. They literally signed a contract and everything saying that they had to marry that person. And apparently, some of the "Prince Charmings" hopefuls were getting really into it too. One man left a couple hundred dollars, an iPad, and his address so the girl could come visit him. Another one started bawling when the girl didn't wake up. (Geez. People these days.)
Whenever you find a creepy-lookin' house in the middle of the woods that is inhabited by a bunch of single dwarf old dudes, you should definitely break in, mess up all their stuff and let in a bunch of wild animals too!
Yeah, thanks a lot Snow White. Because as we all know, that's totally normal. *facepalm* Couldn't those scriptwriters made it any more strange?
Fruit is bad for you.
Just look what happened to Snow White. That girl ate just a bite of an apple and died. Obviously, Snow White has some... judgement issues. (Just kidding... or am I??)
LESSON NUMBER FOUR:
Pshaw. When you have to choose a guy, make sure to choose a poor, sweet-talking thief... who knows, he might have a pet monkey! And make sure to never choose a man who is older, richer, a friend of your father, and has magical powers.
No explanation necessary.